Practice What you Preach

Ok so don't you hate it when you find yourself doing what you tell your kids not to? My Oldest is constantly telling me what the other 2 are doing wrong and I'm always saying "You need to look at yourself first and don't worry about them!!"

I also tell married couples that when they come to me with problems "Disclaimer I"m not a marriage counselor or any type of counselor for that matter, but with 17yrs of marital experience under my belt,  well I can give advise" I think its very important that we fix ourselves and everything will fall into place.. That is very wise advise  If I do say so myself !! But guess what? Just Guess?? Yup you guessed it.  It does not pertain to me its only for everyone else!!! LOL

Ok  seriously Tyler and I Have been at this for almost 3yrs. I Have to say our first 6 months were really good he was consistent and we just had a groove and then it all fell apart. We go back and forth with it. He's consistent then he doesn't care or so i think he doesn't. we have talks. I Tell him what I want but hmmm as I'm writing this I don't think he's ever really said what he wants. Hmmm when he says "Its not all about you Daisy" and I think "What nothing is ever about me? Are you kidding?"  Maybe it is about me. Maybe I found something that makes me really click and I really like and I really need it and i just want it to go the way I think it should..






I don't do the things for him that I did in the beginning. The little things that make him feel special.. I realized that the other day and started doing it. I also realized I have to keep in mind set and that's hard. almost a year ago Tyler and I agreed that I should quit some boards I was on and then when i wanted to go back he said no.. Then over the last few months I really started reading blogs more. He is ok with blogs. When I started reading more and participating  in them things have changed.. I've been working harder at being submissive. I've been telling him sorry when i realize i was disrespectful.. NO I'm not saying sorry over his knee I just say sorry.

He's very dominant he expects respect and for me to do what he asked. If I step out of line he doesn't always spank when I think he should or be consistent like I think he should but he does lecture and tell me how disappointed he is.. However when I sit and ponder over the last 2 months he has been more consistent but I've been more submissive. Maybe he has a point I want this lifestyle if its my way. If its not my way then See ya Later I"m doing what I want!! Hmmm..

Ok Counseling myself time is over lol   Funny when you put things into words it comes into perspective.

Hmm I guess I have alot of pondering to do.. I have alot of changing to work on. I have alot of proving to him I want this life style and I need it. I think maybe were exactly where we need to be because I am happy. He is in charge.. I think I need to walk through my front door. Brush my day away and work on being the submissive little wife I want to be and the one my hubs wants.
 


Thanks for listening and any advise is great especially from other Hoh's or Tops or anyone!!